DIETER F. UCHTDORF – The next speaker at this Conference will be Donald J. Trump of the US Presidency. Following his remarks, the Choir will sing “Master, the Tempest Is Raging.” Brother Trump…
DONALD J. TRUMP – Thank you. It’s a terrific honor to be here, and I’ve got to tell you, this Conference Center is just fantastic. These beautiful flowers and people coming up to me and say “President Trump, thank you so much” and “President Trump, we love you,” it’s just been amazing. It’s a great, great pleasure to be here.
And I also couldn’t help but notice the official name of the church is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I don’t know if everybody knows this but “Jesus Christ” is right there in the name. Did you know that? It’s true. You should probably do some kind of marketing campaign so more people could understand that. More people should know more about Jesus, and nobody knows more about Jesus than me, believe me.
So this church was started by Joseph Smith, right? And more and more people are learning about him and the fantastic things he’s doing so I think that’s a beautiful thing, that’s just a great, great thing. Did you know he married beautiful younger women? Many people don’t understand that, but marrying younger women can be a very nice thing. Yeah, I see the TelePrompter but I’m not going to use it. What, do I look like President Obama? He couldn’t say two sentences in a row without using a TelePrompter. I still think that birth certificate is faked, by the way.
So you have this church and you have these beautiful temples. Those temples are amazing, aren’t they, folks? I think I need to go into one tomorrow. yeah, I know you have to be a member, but come on, I’m the President, right, Monson? Monson, you okay? You don’t look so good. Anyway, yes, I’d love to walk around in one. Besides I have here a temple recommend someone gave me. Always wanted one of these. This covers the bases, right? So I’m going to visit the temple tomorrow. Probably that one across the street. Did you know it took forty years to build it? It’s true. Now if I’d built it, it would have been twice as beautiful and done in two years. I’m just kidding, folks.
So I’m looking in the Book of Mormon, and they tell me Jesus is in it. And I know this because I read. It says here in Three Nephi that Jesus came. Isn’t that wonderful, folks? He came down and he talked to the people and he didn’t care who was white or who was not, he just spoke to everybody, and I think that’s wonderful. I talk to everybody too. Nobody is less racist than me.
My time is up? Are you sure? Okay, it looks like I’m out of time, but this was a lot of fun. So be good to each other, follow what Jesus said, and we’re going to build a wall, and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir will sing at its grand opening, believe me. I say “Amen” or something, now, right?
DIETER F. UCHTDORF – We would like to thank Brother Trump for his efforts. We would also like to release with a vote of thanks Brother Trump and designate him Emeritus US President. All in favor?