Midday Commentary on a Week’s Worth of News — July 2, 2015

I really had no clue how to tackle the entire spectrum of news coming out of SCOTUS last week, so instead I did what any reasonable person would do, I ran and hid.

So with a little time to digest it all, here are just a few take-aways:

• To the Tumblerina Twitterati FB SJWs, you are doing amazing work. Keep it up! I definitely think your efforts helped to sway a few of the SCOTUS justices, especially Alito, who’s a known lurker in multiple subreddits.

• Relying on the benevolence of 9 people for the last word on everything is maybe not the best idea. I mean, these guys think it’s cool to go to work in black robes, refuse to speak from the bench, get too plastered to stay awake during a State of the Union, shake their fist at “the hippies” and are lead by a bipolar freak show.

• Next up better be polygamy and all the rest of the consenting adults variants. Sitting back and watching the legislative mayhem alone would make it all worth it. Plus, it makes plenty of sense.

Speaking of which, to the news!

Dude wants his polygamous marriage legalized because ‘You can’t have marriage equality without polygamy.’ (AP via Trib)

Dude defends himself to varying degrees of success/failure because he’s Ralph Becker and his opponents are beating him like a rented mule. (Dnews)

• The Dude upstairs is probably snickering at the conversations about to happen in LDS Churches, Opinionas old-school Mormons are going to have to sit through discussions about what the SCOTUS ruling means and doesn’t mean and the new-school Mormons can’t wait to talk it out. (KUER)

• The dude who was the alleged victim in the unbelievably horrific hate crime in Delta informs us why it was so unbelievable: It was a complete fabrication. Attorney Brett Tolman wins the Captain Obvious button for the week:

“Our client has acknowledged that these incidents really were a cry for help…,” Tolman told FOX 13. “…I think it’s a strong indication there are issues that need to be dealt with.”

Dudes rehash the tax increase argument that is several hundred years old. “We’re in dire straights, we need your money!” vs. “I’m tired of giving you my money, pot holes are like carnival rides anyway!” (Trib)

• The Hub’s dude who reads reviews Mormon Rivals and finds it good.

“For political junkies, Mormon Rivals, published by the Salt Lake Tribune, is like opening a bag of Cheetos.”

Which could have been a reference to the said Rivals’ skin tone.

Federal dudes want to write their own subpoenas and get your sensitive information. State dudes displeased.

”I think it’s very disappointing that the federal government thinks they’re somehow exempt from the 4th Amendment,” [Sen. Todd] Weiler said, referring to the constitutional amendment protecting citizens’ rights against unreasonable searches.

”I mean the 4th Amendment was designed to keep the government out of people’s private business unless they can show probable cause,” he said. ”I think it’s disgusting that this is what it’s come to, that the federal government thinks they have a right to see whatever they want and the 4th Amendment means nothing.”

And if none of that interests you, perhaps it’s because you are currently drowning in fear about whether it will be the dolphins who are humanity’s unmaking, or robots.

Dolphin

 

 

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